THE KING OF INNUENDO
7-1-09
What better way to kick off July than with some extraordinarily thinly veiled bedroom insinuation? Above is the latest Burger King ad campaign, selling…well…it’s pretty obvious isn’t it? I don’t think any further commentary is really necessary, save this one morsel: at a meager $6.25, BK’s gonna’s lose money on this deal. That’s a steal! Perhaps Super Bowl XXXIII would have turned out differently had Eugene Robinson gone for this brand of…ah, never mind.
By the way, don't expect to see this ad anywhere in your neck of the woods, unless you're reading this in Singapore.
IN STUDIO?
6-30-09
We may have the honor of hosting Julianne Hough in studio today. Keep your fingers crossed.
UPDATED: We got her! Here's a link to the podcasted interview (Segment 2) -- http://feeds.museumpods.com/wnflmorningshow.xml
POWDER TO START FOR MIAMI DOLPHINS
6-30-09
That’s Chad Pennington, posing for an upcoming issue of SOBeFiT Magazine. Correct me if I’m wrong, but he’s the QB for the Miami Dolphins, right? There’s really no excuse for rockin’ the albino look. You can’t even fall back on the “it’s winter” defense. It’s almost July. You get tan by accident in July…pretty much anywhere in the U.S. Plus, I’d find it hard to believe that this shoot snuck up on the guy.
“Oh no! What day is it? Crap, I have that photo shoot with SOBe! I knew I should have left the house in the past three months.”
You’ve got to admire a guy who isn’t trying to be someone other than himself. After all, I can’t recall a single image of Chad that didn’t make me reach for my shades. And truth be told, if images of a bronzed Pennington had surfaced in advance of the magazine’s release, I probably would have blogged about how Chad was clearly working overtime to sex himself up:
“C’mon, Chad, who do you think you’re foolin’? We all know you’re made of paste.” is something I imagine would have been written.
So, kudos for the “I am who I am” approach. But man…you are really white. One day in the sun isn’t going to kill you.
A-RODG SQUEEZES GRAPEFRUIT
6-29-09
I wish I could take credit for that headline, but alas, it is not mine.
Aaron Rodgers is reportedly dating model, and grapefruit heiress, Julie Henderson. You may have seen her “work” in the SI Swimsuit issue. She’s the freckled gal above.
Let’s start here: one dinner in NYC a relationship does not make. Remember the photo of him with that blonde number in Vegas? It turned out to be just that – a dude sittin’ with a blonde chick in Vegas. So, this may be just a guy having dinner with a girl.
But in the event that they are hooked up… here’s a little background on Ms. Henderson:
· The grapefruit heiress tag accompanies her as a result of her grandfather’s work in Texas. Apparently, there is a grapefruit variety that bears the family name – yep, the Henderson. I guess it’s of the ruby variety.
· Jules is previously linked to music mogul Russell Simmons.
· She was born in 1986.
That’s pretty much all I can track down about this chick, and I have to admit, that has me worried. Her Wikipedia entry is frighteningly brief, and I’ve yet to locate an actual date of birth. So far, the best I can do is sometime between January 1st and December 31st of 1986. That’s not much to go on. I fear our signal caller may have embarked on a shadowy flight into the dangerous world of a woman who does not exist.
Then there’s the Russell Simmons situation. What is that all about? I mean, this chick is a supermodel. She doesn’t need any help getting discovered. I don’t know. It reeks of Kanye. After all, Simmons dumped her! It wasn’t like one day she woke up next to the guy and had an epiphany, “Goo! What the heck am I doing? He’s a fossil! I could be dating Aaron Rodgers.” Simmons had to go all “Good day, Ma’am. I said good day!” on her. But then again, she shouldn’t need the money, right?
None of the puzzle pieces fit.
Not that he’s looking for it, but I’m afraid I can’t support this relationship. It’s too fishy. Now, we all have some foul seafood in our dating past, but we’re not all charged with running a professional football team.
Don’t do it Aaron. She’s no good for you, man. Unless I’m wrong. Then she’s perfect for you. Shoot, I don’t know. Forget it. Just do whatever you want.
R.I.P. BILLY
Click here to listen to the audio...
6-29-09
If you know the show, you know my affinity for the products you never knew you needed until Billy Mays told you you did. He might be the only dude capable of making chicken salad out of chicken s**t. He was that good.
I couldn’t resist grabbing a few of his finest moments and mixing them into Weird Al’s classic tune, “Mr. Popeil.”
BUCKS DRAFT “REAL COMPTON CITY G”
6-26-09
You’ll hear a lot about Oak Hill Academy. You’ll hear a lot about Lottomatica Virtus Roma in Italy. You’ll even hear a little about Los Angeles. But make no mistake about it, the Bucks’ latest first round selection…is straight outta Compton!
I’ve always wanted to work this diddy into a broadcast. Never really knew how. Enter Brandon Jennings. He really is from Compton. I’m not making that up.
WOW, BEYATCH! CHILL OUT!
6-25-09
Dang. Somebody forgot to tell Joanna Krupa that she’s on a game show. And not even a real game show, really. She’s on “Superstars” – a funsy, eye-candy kind of game show in which athletes and celebs pair up to compete against one another in various athletic events.
I missed the resurrection of this program, though from what I’ve heard, I didn’t miss much, save one classic moment. A caller today referenced the show’s opening episode in which Krupa hands out a catty beat-down to America’s favorite donkey, Terrell Owens. That’s worth launching a YouTube search, right?
But wait! No. Is it possible? Is it possible that I’m with T.O. on this one? Yeah. Yeah. I’m with T.O. on this one.
STAY WITH IT
6-24-09
It’ll grab you right away, then you’ll wonder where it’s going, but I urge you not to pull the ripcord prematurely. You’ll want to. Around 2:20 you’ll convince yourself that you’ve gleaned from the clip all that is has to offer. You haven’t. The mix is 4:16, and you do want it all. Trust me. What a great piece of work.
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